Another doctor's appointment...

I took Joel back to see Dr. Foldvary today because I was concerned about him not going to the bathroom and the fact that he was awake literally all night last night screaming until he was red in the face. Dr. Foldvary checked him out and said that he thinks he is a little colicky and that he probably still has some day/night issues. He suggested something called "gripe water", which is a homeopathic drop that is supposed to help with the colic. Also, he suggested we try 1/2 teaspoon of rice cereal in his midnight bottle. I can't believe he is putting him on cereal at less than a month old, but the doctor said that he is hoping that this small amount is enough to help with any acid reflux that might be happening. He is not concerned about "bulking him up", which is apparently what some people think happens if you start cereal too early. That small amount should not make any difference. Also, Joel weighs 6 pounds, 4 ounces! Dr. Foldvary said that the reason he has slowed down with the diapers is because his digestive system is getting better at absorbing the calories and he has less waste in general. Obviously he is doing something right since he is gaining weight! I was also worried because he would not wake up for two feedings today, but the doctor said that it was as simple as he wore himself out screaming and had to rest up. He took his late afternoon and evening bottles well. We'll see how he does with the cereal bottle later. The doctor was also very clear that our night time issues are not any type of withdrawal or lingering issue from the birthmother. Hopefully he got us on the right track and tonight will be better for everyone involved! Poor Bailey....she just sort of follows me around while he screams and looks worried! Let's keep our fingers crossed for a more peaceful night....

"Mommy's Little Man" outfit...my favorite!

"Daddy's MVP" outfit...isn't he cute?

Getting into a routine

The Fosters are slowly but surely settling into a routine with the baby and family life in general. Joel is gradually getting a little better about sleeping at night. We still have a ways to go, but at least Mom and Dad are able to function a little bit! We have figured out that he does not like to have his diaper changed or his clothes changed. He is quite loud when that is going on! We are busy with laundry, dishes, and many, MANY baby bottles! The liquid formula sure is nice, but its expensive! Mixing the formula is easy enough, it just has to be done so often! Nothing else too exciting to report here....just learning how to take care of our little bundle of joy and loving him more every day! More later...

Joel and Daddy...checking out some "March Madness"! (Doesn't Daddy look just a little sleepy?)

Rob and his TWO babies!

Joel's first pediatrician appointment

We took Joel to see Dr. Foldvary today for his first doctor's appointment. It was supposed to be tomorrow, but they called this morning and asked us to come this afternoon. They did a physical exam and said that he is very healthy and that he does show some "advanced development" given his prematurity. Yeah!!!! AND....he weighs 5 pounds, 9 1/2 ounces! I thought he was looking bigger! We don't have to go back for another month, and his immunizations should start after that. The doctor was quite impressed with his development and we were surely happy about that! Plus, the doctor told us to try to use some gas drops to make him more comfortable at night in hopes of getting him to relax and sleep more. We ran right out and bought those, let me tell you! After the appointment we stopped briefly at my old office and at Rob's office to show him off a little bit. Unfortunately the wait at the doctor's office and the other stops put his schedule off for eating and he has been pretty cranky since then. Hopefully the drops will help. He's crying now, so it's Mommy to the rescue! More later! Good night all!

Almost three weeks old!

Whew! The last few days have been a whirlwind! We got home Friday afternoon from Dayton. Joel was very good in the car and slept the whole way home. Putting a five pound baby in that carseat was ridiculous...but we did it and everyone survived! Yes, he does (or did) weigh 5 pounds, 1 ounce when we brought him home. He looks big to us, but everyone else can't believe how tiny he is! Friday and Saturday nights were loooooong.....Joel didn't want to sleep at all and screamed almost all night long. Since I had not slept well most of the time we were in Dayton, I was about delirious. Joel is doing better these last couple of nights. He is still definitely fussier during the night than he is during the day but at least he doesn't scream as much! On Monday I ventured out and took Joel to visit his great-grandma in Wauseon. She seemed to enjoy seeing him, and he was pretty mellow so it went well. He cried most of the way home and seemed irritable for the rest of the night. He was passed around quite a bit and is not yet used to his car seat, so I guess he is entitled to be a little cranky after his first outing. He will be three weeks old tomorrow...it doesn't seem possible! Rob took the day off Friday and we will be taking him to his first pediatrician appointment at the clinic. I'm sure we'll all be ready for a nap after that! Well, I can hear my baby boy crying in the other room, so it is time to start another "night shift". Good night all....I will try and update this as much as possible, providing I can stay awake!

Just got home...Baby Joel checking out the new digs!

Grandma and Grandpa checking out their new grandson.

"Seriously? Who is this and how long is he staying? I don't remember asking for a baby brother!"

Isn't this an attractive picture? I thought it was cute because Bailey was up by us...I should have paid closer attention to my wardrobe!

Day #12: Homeward Bound!

Yeah! I guess the headline gave it away....we get to bring baby boy home tomorrow! We are soooo excited, and scared at the same time. It is a day we have looked forward to since we got married and FINALLY it is going to happen! Joel got circumsised early this morning before we got there. He did so well that the nurse said they didn't have to give him the Tylenol at all. He slept a lot today and did not eat very well, but the nurse said that it could be due to the circumcision earlier. I forgot that he had his hearing tested yesterday and passed, much to his hearing instrument specialist daddy's delight! I got to snuggle him for a while this afternoon while Rob was in the lobby making phone calls. He's so darn sweet. He grunts and makes a lot of weird noises and "talks" a lot...especially when you are trying to get him to eat. He also has a funny little habit of shaking his head side to side when he doesn't want the passy or the bottle. I know he doesn't know what "no" means, but it sure looks like it when he does it! Let's just say he knows what he wants when he wants it! He makes really entertaining faces and loves to have his hands in his face. Sometimes he falls asleep with his fingers spread across his face, like he just wants everyone to go away! We did well today with the soothing techniques we learned in our preemie parenting class. He seemed much calmer and relaxed. We kept the lights low and kept the door mostly shut. He seems to be pretty good at settling himself back to sleep once he wakes up. We are trying not to run and pick him up every time he cries. Most of the time he wimpers a little bit, finds his fingers, and falls back asleep. I'm sure we won't be that lucky when we get home! The nurse told us not to rock him, pat him, and talk to him all at the same time because he will get stressed and start hiccuping. I wasn't sure I was buying that, so I tried doing only one or two of those at a time. It actually worked! When I was just rocking him and talking to him he didn't hiccup at all, but when I did all three (briefly!) he did seem more wiggly and got the hiccups quickly. Who knew? Our big accomplishment for the day (aside from getting Joel sprung!) was to install the car seat in the van. I'm sure we looked ridiculous in the back of the van (no middle seats!)in the parking garage trying to wrestle the base into the seat belts tightly enough. Can't wait to move it when the other seats are back in! Well, we have to go pack and clean up our room so that we will be ready in the morning. I can't believe we are finally coming home! It seems longer than it actually has been, that's for sure. I won't be blogging every night (I'll be a little busy!) but I will update and post pictures once in a while. Thanks again to everyone who has followed our blog and is so interested in our whole process. We couldn't have done this without lots of people at home helping to keep us sane. We will see all of you soon! Good night!

Day #11: Making progress!

Another big day for our little boy! This morning the nurse told us that Joel had taken his bottles well during the night....and even took 60 ccs at 3:00am! He was out like a light when we got there, so we let him sleep for a while. At 12:00 noon he took 45 ccs for Rob and then 34 ccs for me at 3:00. He was quite busy today filling his diaper for us! The boy can poop, that's for sure! I talked to the doctor this morning and he is still planning for a discharge either Friday or Saturday. They did Joel's "car seat test" today. He had to sit strapped into his car seat for an hour and a half while they monitored his breathing and oxygen levels to make sure he could ride safely. He wasn't happy about being in the seat at first, but then settled down and passed with flying colors. We also gave him his first bath late this afternoon. Since he is a preemie, they want you to do a "swaddle bath". We did okay with it, but we made it look pretty hard, I'm afraid! I forgot, after his car seat test, they said that he could go into a crib and that they would consider him out of the isolette as of noon when the car seat thing started. That is important, because he has to be in the crib for 48 hours before he can be released, which would be noon on Friday. Hopefully he keeps doing well and can go home on that day. Fingers crossed! Rob and I went to the preemie parenting class at 6:00. There was a lot of information, but I think the thing that stuck with me the most was when the instructor told us that Joel is NOT a small infant, he is a preemie and there is a big difference. We are going to have to be careful about exposing him to too many germs, etc. for his own protection. I hope people understand if we don't take him a lot of places right away. He seems bigger to us now since he has put on some weight, but when I look at the pictures of him in his car seat he looks sooooo tiny! His preemie clothes are getting snug. He is still in them weight-wise, but some of them are getting too short. They should work for a while, though. I'm glad that there are so many people who want to meet him, but we are going to have to be the hypervigilant parents for a while for his own good. Not that people can't see him, but I don't think we will be passing him around much. By the way, today is his two-week birthday! Happy Birthday Baby!! After our class we went back to see him and he was really fussy, which is unusual for him after he eats. Rob was able to get him to calm down eventually, and he stayed asleep when we put him down around 8:15. He should get his circumcision in the morning, so tomorrow is bound to be a rough day for him. The nurse said they would give him Tylenol for the pain....I wonder what they'll give Mom and Dad??? Anyway, thanks agin to everyone for thinking of us while we are away. Hopefully we'll be home soon! Good night...

Day #10: Whew! What a day!

Today was a great day! I actually made it to the hospital this morning in time for his 9:00 feeding. Before I fed him, the nurse said that he is now on "ad-lib" feeding and that they were going to take out his feeding tube! I finally got to see the boy with nothing sticking out of his face or head! And yes, he is adorable! He did really, really well with his bottles. Once he took 45ccs and he only needed to take 40! I got to cuddle him for a while before he went back into the isolette. I love it when he wraps his fingers around my thumb! Baby Joshua went home today, and when they came in to take his hospital pictures they decided to take Joel's too, since he didn't have the feeding tube anymore. (By the way, I talked to Joshua's mom today and she was feeling more optimistic about his condition. She said the hospital gave her the number of a woman who had a baby eight years ago with the same condition. Her little girl is still alive, and Joshua will be seeing her doctor. Good news for them!) Well, I know that all of you mothers out there think your baby is the most beautiful baby ever, but you are INCORRECT! :0) He was soooooo good! The pictures are adorable. I decided not to put them on the internet, because they would have to put his birth name and his birthmother's name. I don't think so! Anyway, I will have the proofs when we get home. He is an angel, that's for sure! Rob got here around 4:00 this afternoon. He of course was eager to hold the baby and make up for some lost "Daddy time". We got him to take 40ccs again....what a good boy! The nurse thinks that he will go into a crib tomorrow and then home at the end of the week. Keep your fingers crossed for us! Courtney called this afternoon and made arrangements for us to meet her mother with her after her mom got off work. We did finally meet with them around 6:30. The meeting went really well. We taked until about 9:00 and she held the baby a lot. She was very nice and said that, while she had big problems with this in the beginning, she was glad she got to meet us and was glad that we were adopting her grandson since her daughter can't take care of him. It was such a relief that everyone got along! Courtney came too and she was really talkative. We learned a lot about her and her family. She and her mother even got along! (Apparently that doesn't happen often!) Courtney's mother was going to sit with the baby for a while longer when we left at 9:00. I'm not sure if she knows that we are calling him Joel and not Aiden, but we didn't want to push our luck! Now we are back at Ronald McDonald House and about ready to collapse! Good night all! I hope to have good news again tomorrow night......

This is what 4 pounds, 13 and 3/4 ounces looks like!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Good news!

I just talked with the hospital and got some good news about our baby boy! I talked to his night nurse who said that he took his whole bottle in five minutes at his 9:00 feeding and she thinks they might take his feeding tube out sometime tomorrow! YEAH!!! Then he needs to go into a crib and then he is closer to coming home! She also told me that his biological grandmother was there tonight and that she was extremely broken up about not being a part of his life. She does admit that there is nothing she can so about it. I don't know if she is planning to come back and meet with us or not. I hope Courtney shows her the pictures we send after we get home. I was really angry with her for a while, but I can see how it would be devastating to know that you aren't going to see him again. This whole adoption thing is very, very hard all the way around, and you can only do what you think is best and go from there. I just hope he is released this week. I want the little guy home....NOW!!! Also, the night nurse said that he gained almost two whole ounces since last night and is now tipping the scales at a whopping 4 pounds, 12 ounces...a new record! More later tomorrow!(Hopefully I can blog about seeing my boy's face without a feeding tube sticking out of it! :0) )

Day #9: Momma bonding and computer success!

Yeah!!! My laptop is working again!!! I can finally amuse myself in the evenings. THAT is a relief! Anyway, I spent the day with Joel in the hospital. When I got there, his nurse said that he had taken all of his last two bottles! She suggested that I leave him in the isolette between feedings so that he could get a good sound sleep and not waste any calories before his next feeding. I did it, but I didn't like it! I had a little issue with the nurse today, and I sincerely hope she is not there tomorrow. She made several comments that I found both rude and unnecessary. This is the first time that any of the staff has been irritating, so I guess we are lucky that way. While I was changing his diaper today, Joel grabbed my thumb with both of his hands and held on tight. It made my heart melt! I know when he smiles it is only gas, but he smiles a lot and it is absolutely adorable! He seemed a lot more interactive today...he stroked my shirt with his fingers while he was eating and really seemed like he was staring at me when he was making noises. He was really alert. The combination of more formula, higher caloric intake, and longer and more restful naps seem to contribute to a more alert and happy baby boy! Rob is coming back tomorrow afternoon. Joel and I are both looking forward to that! I forgot to mention yesterday that the hospital chaplain came by and did a quick and simple baby blessing. We will obviously still have him baptized when we get home, but he said some wonderful things in his blessing and we were glad we decided to have him so it. Joel got a certificate for his blessing today. He now weighs 4 pounds, 10 ounces, but that should go up. I need to get there early tomorrow to try and catch the doctor on his rounds. I need to ask if we will be able to move him to a crib or remove his feeding tube tomorrow. Keep our fingers crossed and say a prayer that at least one of those things will happen...we need some progress so that we can get the little guy home! Good night all....

Day#8: Where's the Geek Squad when you need them?

Holy cow! You have NO idea how long it took me to post these pictures on this blog tonight! The wireless network is still not working here (at least on my laptop), and Cara the night manager finally took pity on me and let me use her computer on her network to post. Supposedly she is going to figure out the problem with the RMH wireless tomorrow, but no one has been able to do so yet! I am not going to send the pictures through the e-mail anymore....it is too much of a hassle and the files keep coming back marked "too big". Anyone who wants to look at the pictures will need to check the blog or shutterfly (password: joelaiden). ANYWAY...today was another good day. Joel is continuing to get stronger and doing a little better with his bottle every day. Mom got a little frustrated this afternoon because he ate better for the nurse than he did for us and he will probably starve when he comes home (a little theatrical, but I can't help it!), but the nurse continues to say that he will catch on soon. He is up to 4 pounds, 10 1/2 ounces, so he is gaining weight. The doctor came in again today and said that he should be home by next weekend. We hope so because the routine is getting monotonous. After being with the baby all day we pretty much come back to the RMH and do whatever laundry the baby has dirtied during the day and watch TV. I have some stories about this place, but those are better shared later! The staff here is really nice, but other than that I am not too impressed I guess. We must be making progress, though, because the nurse told me to bring in his car seat and an outfit for his hospital picture tomorrow. They won't take his picture until his feeding tube is out, but this is a good sign. We also made arrangements for his circumcision in a couple of days. We have a favorite nurse (Sheila) and she told me that I probably would not want to be there for that as it is done in the room. No problem...I already feel guilty enough about signing a paper giving the doctor permission to hurt my baby as it is! He is loveable as can be and I can't wait for us to come home. Everyday I see what the family next to us goes through and it makes me so happy that baby Joel is so healthy despite coming early. Baby Joshua coded once today while I was there. They got him back and hooked him back up to the monitors, but it was scary. His mother had just walked out of the room about a minute before it happened and luckily the nurse was in the room talking to us when the monitor went off. I guess he is going home on Tuesday, but they have to take a bunch of equipment with them. Keep them in your prayers. They need it. Rob went back to Defiance tonight. He is working tomorrow and Marty our neighbor is bringing him back on Tuesday afternoon. The logic there is that we only want one car down here when Joel is discharged. We are so thankful to all of our friends and family who have really gone out of their way to help us while we are here. It's not easy being away from home, but at least we feel like things are under control there. It is so sweet watching Rob with Joel! He changes his diaper (even the nasty ones!) without complaining at all and is eager to take his temperature and feed him. We try to take turns. I'll get him all day tomorrow, so Daddy will have some catching up to do once he comes back! I'm off to the shower, so this is all for tonight. Enjoy the pictures! Good night!

Day #7: Soooo tired!

Hello all! This one should be short, one because I'm too tired to type and two because there is not much to report today. Joel continues to do well. The nurse told us that his weight is fine for him to be discharged, but he needs to eat more and more consistently. They keep reassuring us that he is catching on and that once he figures it out (and quits falling asleep!) he will begin to gain weight more quickly. Today we pretty much just sat and snuggled him for most of the day while he slept. It is kind of frustrating because there is nothing you can really do to help him....he just has to do it on his own. He is a very good baby and hardly cries at all unless you are messing with him or it is time to eat. He settles right back down once he gets his passy or you put your hands on his back or his head. Apparently since he is so small he needs to feel "contained" in order to be comfortable. The meeting with his biological grandmother did not happen today. She was taking care of another one of her grandkids and could not find a sitter so she could come to the hospital. It should happen next week sometime, but I have to admit it would be okay with me if we left town before that! I'm not too worried about it, but it's just one of those things I would like to not have to deal with. We left the hosptial around 5:00 and went to WalMart to print pictures and the Barnes and Noble to buy a book the nurse recommended. We came back to the Ronald McDonald House a while ago, and I thnk we are going to bed early. Rob is leaving tomorrow night and coming back on Tuesday. Our neighbor Marty is bringing him to the hospital Tuesday so that we only have one car here when Joel is released. Yeah!!! I miss my house, my dog, and my bed! (Of course, I miss people too.....!) Good night and more tomorrow! By the way...I still haven't messed around with the laptop yet to see if I can post pictures. Probably tomorrow night.....

Day #6: Good news and exhaustion sets in!

Another good news day for the Fosters. Joel is doing REALLY well. In fact, the doctor today told us that we will be bringing him home in less than a week (as long as he continues to progress)! It was a busy day for Mom and Dad today. When we got there we had to feed him right away, since the little guy was starving. He continues to do well with his bottles. He still is not taking the whole amount. They have kept his intake at 40ccs but switched him to a higher calorie formula. He takes about 25-30 ccs before he conks out. They finish his feeding with the tube still in his nose. Speaking of which, he pulled it out this morning and had to have it put back in. He cannot keep his hands out of his face! They almost decided to just leave it out but did not. He needs to "ad lib" feed, which apparently means eat a decent but not predetermined amount at each feeding (eating only what he wants) consistently. It's easy to get frustrated, but everyone assures us that he will get it soon. This morning Rob and I went to the Infant CPR class in the hospital. It was quick but thorough...hopefully we NEVER need it. Then it was back upstairs for another feeding. I hate to be biased, but he is soooo darn cute! We got to snuggle him for a long time this afternoon. I think he is starting to suck his thumb and is quite the cuddlebug! I also swear that his hair is getting longer, but that could be wrong. Late today we met with the occupational therapist to learn baby massage. Some of Joel's muscles are very tight (due to prematurity) and the massage was to help with that. Well, at first he screamed and didn't seem to like it, but once we rolled him over on his side to do his arms and legs he really did relax considerably. He was out of it after that! Baby massage is fun for Mom and Dad too. Anyone want a lesson? :0) Since he was pretty much unconscious after that we decided to leave. Oops...I forgot to mention that the nurse started reviewing our discharge paperwork with us this afternoon, so we must be making progress! Also, Courtney and Jeff stopped by today to see the baby. I really admire her for recognizing that she does not want to be a parent and sticking to her decision. She clearly loves the baby but does not seem to enjoy caring for him unless he is just cuddling quietly. As soon as he fusses, she hands him back to me. That's fine by me! After we left the hospital we went to Cincinnati to have dinner with Rob's sister and her family. Afterwards, we went to Babies R Us and registered. We picked up some diapers, lotion, and small miscellaneous things that we will not want to run out and get once we get home. By the time we got back to the Ronald McDonald House we were both completely exhausted and not even speaking in complete sentences. Right now Rob is on the couch in the laundry room watching TV and waiting for Joel's laundry to be done while I type this. I am way too tired tonight to mess around with the laptop. Tomorrow evening should be quiet and I plan to try it again then. I hope it works....I have some really cute pictures to post! We are still scheduled to meet with Courtney and her mother tomorrow, so wish us luck with that. I'm sure it will be fine, but think good thoughts for us! Happy Birthday, Dad! More tomorrow.......I'm going to go wake up my hubby now and check on the laundry! Good night!

Day #5: Lots of snuggling and Momma-time

Today was another good day for Joel. When I got there this morning (after an hour long detour because I can't follow directions) he had just finished his morning bottle--all of it--and was sleeping. The nurse said he had good diapers all night long and that he was doing well. After a while I took him out of the isolette and just sat and rocked him--definitely a highlight of my day! He was content to sleep in my arms for about an hour, until he had another unfortunate diaper. He wore the little duck shirt from Aunt Lisa and Uncle Jason today. It was too big, but boy was he cute! Since Rob was in Defiance, I got to have full duty for the day. The doctor came in and again said that it would be "about a week" before he could go home. He still needs to be more consistent with his feedings and gain some weight. He is back down to 4 pounds, 8 ounces, but the nurse said that it is normal and not at all unexpected. He had to have some serious coaxing, but he did finish all three of the bottles that I was there for today. He was a sleepy little guy today! Rob got there about 4:00 and got to hold him for a while before he went back into "the box". When I called tonight after dinner to check on him, the nurse told me that he was finishing the last of his 9:00 bottle and that he was doing well. We'll be back to see him in the morning. I'm not sure what is happening with his roommate, but it probably isn't good. He had no wires hooked up to him at all today, and there is a DNR order above his bed. His dad was there about the same time Rob was and he looked very sad. He's an adorable little baby. It is so sad. Speaking of sad, I think that the stress and lack of control over the whole situation is starting to make me a little crazy. I love being with Joel at the hospital, but it is so frustrating knowing that there is really nothing we can do to help him. It is just a matter of time. I know he will get there, but the stress of having no friends or family around is really unpleasant. Plus, there is the fact that I am getting tired of never knowing where I am going or how to get anywhere twice. I swear that I will NEVER move to a city. NEVER, EVER, EVER!!! I hate it and I would spend all of my time trying to figure out where I was at. Even the hospital is confusing! We finally seem to be figuring out the elevator arrangements, but some times it feels like a fluke when we actually get to the NICU!! Tonight was nice because our friends Dave and Melissa and their sons from West Chester came and met us for dinner in Dayton. Before dinner, Rob and I managed to find the Babies R Us at the Dayton Mall. They had amazingly little for preemies. We may try and find time to go to the Babies R Us in Cincinnati over the weekend to register. It is supposedly a bigger store and we hope to find an outfit for his hospital picture there. We aren't buying much, but we can't have the boy being naked! I guess I am not going to be able to post any more pictures for a while. The lady at Ronald McDonald House worked on my computer today and now it won't let me do anything. I basically have an $800 Solitaire game. Poor Rob. I had a crying jag when I was trying to get it to work earlier and he got the brunt of it. I'm going to see if she can fix it tomorrow. Otherwise I'm not sure how to put the pictures online. I can use the computer at the house to e-mail and blog, but not to upload pictures. I'll try my best. Tomorrow Rob and I have an Infant CPR class in the morning and a massage/bath training in the afternoon. Joel should like the massage, but rumor has it he is not a fan of the bath! Plus, Rob has to get some serious Daddy-time in since he basically missed all day today. I told him he is about 4 nasty diapers behind and needs to catch up! More tomorrow (hopefully less whining!). Good night...

About his name...

Some people have been asking us why we chose the name Joel for the baby. We have had this name selected for a long time. We came across it in a baby name book several years ago and found that the meaning is "God is willing". Finally God is willing to send our baby boy to us!!! Plus, we wanted a name that was kind of unique yet not freakish! (Also, since Abbey and Jason named their dog Tressel we thought that was off the table! THANK GOD!!! :0) )Joel seems to fit him, so it's a keeper!

Day #4: Happy Birthday Joel!

Joel is one week old today! It is amazing to think of how much our lives have changed in 7 loooong days! Joel was wide awake today when we got there, and we got to hold him right away and Daddy did more "skin on skin" time. He was much more cooperative today because NO MORE IV!!!!! Now he needs to get rid of the feeding tube and the other wires he's hooked up to and we can really cuddle him! He drank most of his bottle for the nurse at 9:00 and had to get the rest through his feeding tube. He is just to small to work hard enough to finish the bottle on his own. They have upped his bottle to 37-40 ccs, and he generally takes 20-25 through the bottle before he is asleep. He is still a world class burper! He is back up to 4 pounds 10 ounces, so that is an improvement. He peed on me today, so I quess I have been officially initiated into the club! He slept most of the time until his 3:00 feeding, which I did alone since Rob took Bailey back to Defiance. He is going to get some things taken care of at home and be back sometime tomorrow. Joel took 25ccs from the bottle for me and the rest through the tube. The doctor was in today and said again that he thinks maybe another week would be possible before sending him home. Let's keep our fingers crossed! The baby next to Joel, Joshua, is not doing well at all, and that upset me a lot today. We haven't talked much to his parents, but I was in the room today when the doctor told his mother that she would set up Hospice for her and that she recommended they take him home and let nature take it's course. He apparently has some kind of genetic heart defect. He was born the day before Joel and is smaller than he is. Please say a prayer for their family. I have only had a son for three days and I can't even imagine what that has to be like. Anyway, after Joel's 3:00 feeding he began to have what the nurse delicately referred to as "liquid stools" (sorry, but you weren't actually there so I don't feel I need to mince words!) His bottom is very sore and the nurse told me that she needed to put him back in the isolette with his bare bottom up to get some air on it. He was NOT a fan of that, let me tell you! He finally fell asleep, so I left since she needed him to stay there until his 6:00 feeding. I got myself to the Ronald McDonald House okay. It is a weird place. The common areas are very nice and food and laundry are free. The rooms, however, have no TV or radio and are very small and dark. Pretty depressing, if you ask me. I'm feeling pretty lonely tonight, but I think I will just go to bed early and try to get to the hospital earlier than usual in the morning for some Momma time. Joel was making some pretty cute faces this morning. Rob got a really cute picture of him with a big smile on his face. Speaking of pictures....I could not post any tonight because I can't get my laptop to work here. The front desk said that they would have someone help me tomorrow. I'm feeling withdrawal! Hopefully it will be fixed tomorrow and I can start sending pictures again. Also, I want to apologize for not answering all of my e-mails and phone messages individually. By the time the end of the day rolls around, we are too tired to do much but sleep and get ready to see the baby the next day. I hope people understand. We can't wait for young Mr.Foster to start making the rounds once he bulks up a little bit! Good night....

Day #3: A case of the grumpies!

Today was a hard day for baby Joel. When we got there, the new shift nurse told us that he had done well during the night but that they had to change the IV in his head because it failed to work (antibiotic infusions). They had to put it in his hand. It was the most awful thing to see that teeny tiny little hand all poked and taped up. He really moves his hands around a lot (he'll probably be a thumb-sucker!) and he seemed to be really uncomfortable most of the day. He also cut back on his bottles, although the nurse said that it could be because of his discomfort. He still took them, but not quite as much and they had to feed his the rest through his feeding tube. He spent a lot of the day in his isolette because of his crankiness and the need to keep his arm/hand in one position. It was hard on Mom and Dad! At one point when Rob was out of the room I was watching the nurse assess him and his hand IV blew out. There was blood EVERYWHERE....I did not do well with that at all. He was a trooper though. The nurses had to try and get another IV going. They tried his head again but ultimately ended up poking him 6 times before putting it back in his other hand. They had me leave the room, but I was almost in tears right outside the door just knowing what they were doing. Joel only cried out once and was really cooperative with them. We tried the "chest to chest" stuff again today, but he was not in the mood and cried really hard. We think it was because there was no comfortable position for his arm. He was much happier when we just wrapped him in his soft blanket and rocked him. He did eat better for us than the nurse, but didn't finish the bottles without his feeding tube. We saw the doctor briefly today. He says that Joel is doing very well, and suggested that he might only have to stay another week instead of two! We aren't counting on that, of course, but it does sound encouraging! All he needs to do is start eating better and gain some weight. His temperature was a little lower today than they like, but he is still learning to maintain it on his own. Mom and Dad really love cuddling him to bring that temperature up! Some good news is that his last antibiotic infusion will be at 2:00am and then they will take the IV out. So when we get there tomorrow he will have no IV! YEAH!!!! It is amazing to us that a little over a week ago we knew nothing about all this, and now we are fluent in CCs and NG tubes and are fairly skilled at changing a nasty diaper through the two holes in the isolette while holding down his arm with the IV in it! Poor baby! Hopefully tomorrow he will be in a much better mood since he will be able to move his hands and not have needles sticking in him! Also, a MAJOR relief to us is that we did talk to Courtney today and her mother seems to be much more accepting of the situation and actually wants to meet with us to talk to us and give us some gifts she bought for him. I started out really hating her for trying to cause problems, but I love him so much after three days that I can't imagine how it must feel to know he is going to be adopted and move away. We are meeting with Courtney and her mother Saturday sometime at the hospital. Prayers for all of us that it goes well. I think it will be fine. Also, we are moving to the Ronald McDonald house tomorrow. The hotel we are at now is $99/night and the Ronald McDonald house is much more economical. Rob is actually going home tomorrow afternoon and taking Bailey with him. (Thanks Abel for coming to get him!) She has spent way too much time in the hotel room alone, and that is one last thing to worry about. I will miss her like crazy, but it is better than having to rush back to the hotel to make sure she isn't misbehaving or peeing on the floor. Our neighbors Marty and Sue are going to watch her for a while (thanks guys!). Rob is going to take care of some banking, check on the house, and do some errands. He is driving himself back here sometime Thursday. He has to get back as soon as possible because the occupational therapist was in today and wants to teach us how to do a preemie massage! Joel's roommate's parents did one today on him and it really seemed to relax him and help his muscles relax. Fun!! More updates tomorrow.....Good night all!

Day #2: So in love!

Today was a red-letter day for Joel! When we got there this morning he was finishing his morning bottle...ALL of it! He was wide awake for a while and we got to hold him quite a bit before he had to go back into his isolette (which Rob calls his "box"!). The nurse reported that he did well during the night and that he is doing much better maintaining his own body temperature. We got to meet with the neonatologist today who gave us excellent news. Joel is doing very well with taking the bottle and shows absolutely no signs of drug withdrawal! His birthmother had some drug use, and we were concerned about that. Not only does he not show any signs of withdrawal, but he is doing so well that they are discontinuing the testing series altogether! Yeah!!!! The IV in his head should come out Wednesday, and if he continues to do well on his bottle they will remove his feeding tube. I can't wait to hold him without all the tubes and stuff. The doctor said that he anticipates about two more weeks before he can go home. We of course are hoping for sooner than that. Rob fed him for the first time today. The male bonding must have worked, because boy can this kid burp! His eyes were open a lot today. I love the pictures I posted with his eyes open. We think he might be left-handed because he is always moving his left hand up around his face or to hold your finger. Later this afternoon, our favorite nurse, Angie, helped us with what they call "skin to skin holding", which is supposed to increase his ability to regulate his own temperature and somehow make him gain weight faster. We'll try anything to spring him from the hospital, so we were all for it! Both of us took a turn. You take your shirt off (or open it up) and lay him (wearing nothing but a diaper) directly on your chest. Of course, the nurse covered us with blankets to help with his body temperature. He fussed when they took off his clothes, but settled down immediately once he was on our chests. We each sat with him for about an hour like this. The nurse said he did really well with it, and of course we didn't mind it at all! Rob also got his first diaper change in today. It's not easy with all the wires, but he was a trooper. I got the first nasty diaper today....again, I think the whole "male bonding" thing had something to do with that! Thanks again for the support we are getting from everyone. Please keep us in your prayers. The baby's grandmother is still trying to cause some trouble, but our social worker assures us that there is absolutely nothing she can do to stop the adoption. I had a little (okay, not so little) melt down tonight about that, but our social worker completely reassured both of us that they have done everything completely legally and this baby is not going anywhere but Defiance, Ohio! Oh, I almost forgot. Courtney came to see the baby today and stayed to feed him for a little bit. She again said how happy she was with her decision and was glad that we were so attached to him. She held him but really does not seem too comfortable with it. I think the tubes and everything were too much for her. I would have never thought I could love someone so much after not even knowing him for two days, but I'm smitten! More tomorrow....Good night!

Here he is!

Here he is! Our beautiful little blonde-haired, blue-eyed baby boy! We realize that most of our friends had no idea this was coming. After almost 6 years of trying, we got a call on Monday, March 2 from an adoption agency in Dayton, Ohio. We were told that a birthmother had chosen us and that she was going to have her baby (prematurely) within two weeks. Needless to say we were shocked! As the week went on there were several ups and downs, and we felt that it was best to keep the details to ourselves until we knew more. To make a long story short, the birthmother, Courtney, had him on March 4. His original due date was April 27, the day after my birthday. After waiting the mandatory (and terrifying!) 72 hours required by the state of Ohio, Courtney signed away her rights on Saturday afternoon and we were invited to come meet our son on Sunday the 8th! We are now in Dayton and at least one of us will be here until he is released from the hospital. He could be here until his original due date, but that is very unlikely at this point. He is doing very well. The emotions when we saw him today were amazing. Some people keep saying that I don't seem very excited. Nothing is further from the truth, but the fact is that we have been conditioned to fail for so long that this seems surreal. We spent several hours with him today in the NICU at Miami Valley Hospital. They gave him a bottle for the first time today right before we got there. Before we saw the baby, we met with our social worker, Courtney, and her boyfriend Jeff. They were really nice to talk to and both said they were very happy that we were going to raise the baby. We spent out afternoon holding and feeding the baby. We decided to name him Joel Aiden Jeffrey Foster, as Courtney had named him Aiden Jeffrey and really wanted us to keep that in some way. We initially thought about Joel Aiden or Aiden Robert, but Jeff was so helpful in getting this all to happen that we decided to keep all the names. We love it! This morning he took all of his bottle for the nurse, but the first one we gave him around 3:00 he didn't do very well with and we ended up feeding him through his feeding tube. He is currently 4 pounds 10 ounces, which is pretty good considering how premature he was. We actually gave him another bottle right before we left around 6:30, and he took all but 5ccs. He is quite the burper! The stuff on his head is the IV where they are giving him antibiotics and the nose tube is his feeding tube. They are very pleased with his progress with his bottle, since they weren't even planning to try it for a couple of weeks. The IV tube should come off his head on Wednesday. We are exhausted and definitely ready for bed, but we are happy beyond words! I plan to use this blog to keep everyone posted rather than trying to remember who I tell what. I'll be back soon! Thank you to eveyone for their support and keep Joel and his momma and daddy in your prayers!

We're back!!!

Well, we are back and we have fantastic news! WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!!! We talked to Naomi from Adoption Link on Monday, March 2 about a baby boy from the Dayton area that was coming very soon. The birthmother had selected us, and she was only a couple of weeks away from her premature delivery. Given our horrendous track record, we kept very quiet and said virtually nothing to anyone. The week was full of ups and downs (and ups and downs, and ups and downs!) but to make a long, incredibly stressful story short, we are going to meet our baby boy on Sunday, March 8. He was born on Wednesday, March 4 and weighed 4 pounds, 8 ounces. By all accounts, he is doing very well. We can't wait to meet him! Because of his size he will likely be in the NICU for a few days, so we will be there until he is released most likely. The birthmother named him, and we have agreed to partially honor her wishes. He will be named Joel Aiden Jeffrey Foster. More to come.........